Stardate:        91019.48

Sol III Date:   31/05/2013/1212.30

If you own a car wash, is paying someone to perform a rain danced a tax deductable expense? What if it doesn’t rain? Or is it a tax deduction only if it rains?

What is the key to success?

Hire the right employees.

How do you know you hired the right employees?

You know because the business is successful.

So the key to success is circular reasoning?

Yes, because circular reasoning is the key.

 “Some people never go crazy. What truly horrible lives they must lead.”

 Charles Bukowski

Stardate:        91016.26

 

Sol III Date:   30/05/2013/18:17

Watching one of the media’s final [pseudo] news telecasts of the day I heard it stated that the actions of Harper’s ex-chief of staff Nigel Wright, vis-à-vis Mr. Duffy, were “not in the best interests of Canadians.”

Whatever else you might argue about the actions of Nigel Wright and “the best interests of Canadians,” Mr. Wrights action’s have returned $90,000 to Canadian taxpayers.

Which would certainly seem ‘in the best interest’ of Canadians to me?

Stardate:        91013.8

 

Sol III Date:   29/05/2013/20:41

This is a paper towel dispenser that provides paper towels to dry one’s hands after washing said hands.

Unlike toilet paper the direction the roll of paper towel faces, in or out, is important. If the roll of paper towel is inserted facing the wrong way the paper towel feed jams and the paper towel dispenser has to be opened and the jam cleared. If the roll of paper towel is facing the wrong way it needs to be turned or the dispenser will simply jam again.

Lately it has been frequently necessary to open the dispensers, clear the jam and turn the roll of paper towel to feed in the correct direction.

I hear you thinking “they probably haven’t trained the person who had to replace the empty roll”.

You are right, there is no training on how to change the rool of paper towel in the dispenser.

For a very good reason.

When you open the dispenser, remove the cardboard center of the empty roll and go to put the new roll in, this is what you see:

When you put the new roll of paper towel into the dispenser the instructions are right in your face and in clear, straightforward diagrams. How can you not see the instructions?

Have the members of our society spent so much time in wilful denial, refusing to see, hear or listen to anything they don’t want to know about or think about that we can no longer see the reality right in front of us, right under our noses?  

Stardate:        91009.82

 

Sol III Date:   28/05/2013/09:46

From Our

                               

Files

“We all go. Why not enjoy the go?”

Is Proctor & Gamble’s less than charming advertising campaign to get consumers buying P & G’s Charmin brand of toilet paper.

If the fact there is a “We all go. Why not enjoy the go?” has not caused your brain to explode, here are some mind boggling facts from the “We all go. Why not enjoy the go?” website. 

2006: The Charmin Restrooms opened in Times Square, offering daily visitors free public restrooms during the busy shopping season from Thanksgiving to New Year’s Eve.

2010: The Charmin New York City Restrooms reached 1.5 million visitors! The Charmin Restrooms had more visitors from 2006 through 2010 than the Empire State Building!

A 27-room traveling bathroom facility was a welcome addition to 15 state fairs across the country where the Charmin Bear entertained long lines of fair-goers with an unforgettable Potty Dance.

There is a mobile app to help consumers find clean, comfortable restrooms on the go.

Advertising how soft toilet paper is [“Please, don’t squeeze the Charmin”] makes sense since you don’t want to be using sandpaper on ones waste removal orifice.

But “Why not enjoy the go”?

Do Proctor & Gamble executives really think people are dumb enough to buy into, believe, that buying Charmin will make them “enjoy the go”?

Have we become such metal zombies that an advertising campaign based on a crappy concept such as “enjoy’ the go will have people  shuffling off to buy Charmin toilet paper?

Do bears shit in the Woods?

Stardate:        91005.6

 

Sol III Date:   26/05/2013/20.43

Bible Belt Braying

Let us set aside the fact Abbotsford’s anti-harm reduction bylaw is killing people who do not need to die.

Let us set aside the fact Abbotsford’s anti-harm reduction bylaw is promoting the spread of disease throughout our entire community.

Let us set aside the fact that Abbotsford’s anti-harm reduction bylaw’s ignorance does not change the reality that death and disease are not confined to the victims of the bylaw, but are opportunistic and do not care how ‘holier than thou’ one is when looking for their next host.

Let us set aside the fact Abbotsford’s anti-harm reduction bylaw is costing the taxpayers of Abbotsford and British Columbia hundreds of thousands, millions, of dollars.

Let us set aside the fact Abbotsford’s anti-harm reduction bylaw means the citizens of Abbotsford are denied the benefits of healthcare programs and dollars when those programs contain even the tiniest harm reduction component.

Let us set aside the fact Abbotsford’s anti-harm reduction bylaw singles out a specific group of citizens to deny them healthcare.

Let us set aside the fact Abbotsford’s anti-harm reduction bylaw has forced citizens of Abbotsford to sue in the Courts of Canada the other citizens of Abbotsford to enforce the rights to which those being victimized by the City of Abbotsford bylaw are entitled to as Canadians.

Let us set aside the fact Abbotsford’s anti-harm reduction bylaw stands as proof, actions speaking louder than words, that despite all its self-righteous, self-congratulatory bombast - Abbotsford is NOT a Christian community.

 “Then they also will answer, saying, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry or thirsty or a stranger or naked or sick or in prison, and did not minister to you?’ Then he will answer them, saying, ‘Truly, I say to you, as you did not do it to one of the least of these, you did not do it to me.’”

Let us set aside the fact Abbotsford’s anti-harm reduction bylaw is ethically reprehensible, spiritually corrupt and corrupting.

Setting all that aside we are left with Abbotsford City Council’s pièce de résistance - painting Abbotsford and its citizens as sanctimonious, depraved Jackasses in the eyes of the rest of Canada.

Way to go boys – and girl.

Stardate:        91003.04

 

Sol III Date:   25/05/2013/22:17

Huh, I would have thought better of Wendy’s.

I caught the new Wendy’s TV ad and figured out what it was about the commercial that sounded a discordant note for me.

The commercial where the woman is trying to take advantage of her naive [mentally challenged?] friend by flimflamming the friend into babysitting the deceiver’s children on Friday night.

Presumably leaving the deceiver free, having taken advantage of the ‘friendship’ and dumped the deceiver’s responsibility and children onto the mark, to party Friday night away.

The manager comes up to the pair and attempts to comment about what a good $$$ deal the food is, but keeps being cut off by the deceiver who does not want the mark to know what the cost of the food is.

After several attempts the manager realizes the deceiver does not want the mark to know how inexpensive the food is.

Rather than making sure the intended victim knew the actual cost of the food, the manager supports the deceiver and chooses his words carefully in order to help convince the intended victim that the food cost was higher than it was.

So Wendy’s, according to the moral of the tale (the commercial), corporate policy is to support deceit.

A behaviour consistent with the switch from advertisements featuring Wendy’s founder Dave’s heavyset daughter Wendy, to the new campaign featuring an attractive, more petite redheaded young woman.

Apparently Wendy’s “Quality is our recipe” refers only to the food and not any other aspect of the company’s values, ethics or behaviours.

I suspect the reason I had expected better of Wendy’s is that it is an expectation left over from the era and advertisements featuring Wendy’s founder Dave before Dave passed away.

Stardate:        91000.5

 

Sol III Date:    24/05/2013/23:59

A Riddle.

Due to an irresistible urge to clean my kitchen I have a nicely cleaned kitchen and only these few words of explanation.

Plus all the words for those who can un-riddle the riddle that lies between the lines.

Hint: the more time required to clean = the dirtier the kitchen. Just how messy was my kitchen? 

Stardate:        90997.46

 

Sol III Date:    23/05/2013/21:19

From the ‘How Dumb Are We' Files

The occupants of a car that pulled out of a highway rest stop into the path of a semi were killed..........and the plan is to hold an inquest to determine how not to have this happen again.

Might I suggest that before a vehicle pulls out onto the highway from a rest stop, the driver and occupants use their ocular organs to perform a scan/search to ensure/determine that it is safe to leave the rest stop and enter the flow of traffic on the highway?

Pulling out of a rest stop onto the highway in front of a semi is Dumb, the ‘Splat you’re Dead’ level of dumb

Needing to spend the all those $$$ holding an inquest to figure out that you should NOT pull out of a rest stop into the path of a semi, is the politician level of Dumber.

Stardate:        90994.14 

 

Sol III Date:    22/05/2013/16:13

Racism or PCB [Politically Correct Bullying]

The 11 PM Final Newscandy on a local TV station had a report on a ‘racist incident’ at the Cloverdale Rodeo. The report included a police officer saying they  police were investigating to determine if it was a ‘hate crime’.

The information we were given in the report was that the person claiming she was a victim of racism had gone to the Rodeo with a sign to protest the treatment of the animals involved in the Rodeo as cruelty to animals.

The short video we had was taken by the ‘victim’ with her cell phone and showed the ‘victim’ taunting someone who, one assumes from the context, expressed disagreement on the treatment of animals involved in a Rodeo.

The ‘victim’ repeatedly called upon the person she was videoing with her cell phone to “come on, hit me’.

The words uttered by the ‘victim’ contained no reference or statements about Rodeo being cruelty to the animals involved; just repeated taunts to “come on, hit me”.

The words and tone used by the ‘victim’ in taunting her ‘racist attacker’ appeared to have no purpose but to enrage the ‘racist attacker’ into attacking.

I love to read, I both like and am driven to write and my favoured comedy is George Carlin and Monty Python. If you managed to taunt me into a verbal attack I will take you apart with the skill and precision of a surgeon with a scalpel.

 But most people taunted into a verbal attack are going to be using the verbal equivalent of a sledge hammer. You are a woman with a hairy chin – bearded lady; facial moles – wart face; overweight – fat f**k, fattie, sooooooie; distinctive racial characteristics – racial based insults.

Is using verbal references about fat against a fat person fatism? Is making a verbal attack on a fat person in public with people around inciting hatred of fat people and are you committing a hate crime? Is simply referring to the existence of people who are fat, fatism?

Is not the ‘victim’ guilty of racism for choosing to taunt and egg on a white person to the point the ‘racist’ white person made comments based on the ‘victims’ race? In light of the public reaction to the ‘racist’ did the ‘victim’ not, in singling out a white person to taunt until they lost control, invoke hate?

In ignoring that the cellphone video clearly showed the ‘victim’ taunting and egging on the ‘racist’ to assault the ‘victim’, ignoring the real possibility that this was all about the ‘victim’ getting her 15 minutes of fame, branding the person being taunted a racist and getting the police to speak of investigating whether it was a hate crime and then broadcasting the person’s face far and wide – did not the media incite hate of the ‘racist’? Did the media not also show a callous disregard for life and limb of the ‘racist’?

Racism is based in fear and ignorance. Having no use for fear or ignorance and having been gifted with immense curiosity by my parents I abhor racism.

I have no use for fear and ignorance, not simply because they give rise to racism, but because of all the other issues, problems and consequences they lead humans into.

And one of the aspects of ignorance, of choosing not to think, that I find particularly offensive is trivializing.

In taking an incident that is about human needs and human stupidity and running around like Chicken Little screaming “racism” and “hate crime” media trivialize both racism and hate crimes AND de-sensitize the public to racism and hate crimes.

Creating a growth medium for racism and hate. 

Stardate:        90902.08 

 

Sol III Date:    21/05/2013/22:11

The situation is filled with monumental irony; an irony brimming with delicious black humour.

Pamela Wallin and Mike Duffy, two veteran television reporters who had in their careers hounded politicians and political parties about the lack of ethics and the non-ethical behaviour of the politicians and political party, found themselves forced to resign from the Conservative caucus because of the non-ethical behaviour their personal ethics (or lack thereof) allowed them to engage in.

In light of human nature I wonder how many politicians and ex-politicians derived satisfaction from watching the media do unto Wallin and Duffy, as Wallin and Duffy had done unto others?

One would have thought that the pair of them would have known better than to set themselves up as ‘dinner’ at a media feeding frenzy.

The disturbing aspect about this matter is how quickly, after years of getting in the face of others about their wasting of taxpayer dollars, lack of ethics and pigging out at the public trough,  upon their appointment to the ranks of Conservative Senators, Senators Wallin and Duffy bellied up and began to pig out at the public trough.

Although i suppose that in this case the surprise must be tempered by the fact they were appointed members of the Conservative caucus.

The future of Canada and the legacy that we will pass on to the next generations demands that as Canadians and Canada we re-examine the ideas and ideals that serve as the foundation of our society.

Because while it’s true that the mettle of Duffy and Wallin would only be truly revealed when put to the test with their appointment as senators, the nature of Canada, Canadians and the Society we have built should discourage greedily pigging out at the public trough and a sense of entitlement, rather than supporting the growth of greed and a sense of entitlement.

And as revealing of character as their actions in pigging out at the public trough were, it is the fact that although forced to resign from the Conservative caucus, they have not resigned from the Senate that publicly damns their character.

Stardate:        90988.63  

Sol III Date:    20/05/2013/15:52 

The light at the end of the tunnel WAS a train.

Nigel Wright, Stephen Harper’s ex-Chief of Staff, must be wondering if anyone got the engine number of the train that hit him.

One minute he is cruising along as a top apparatchik of the Harper fiefdom, then BOOM, he turns fifty and has to fall on his sword to protect Stephen Harper.

When first appointed, Mr. Wright commented that he and Stephen Harper shared the same values [values i.e. greed, ego].

From what has recently transpired they apparently shared the same lack of ethics [ethics i.e. honesty, truthfulness] and lack of concern for ethics as well. 

Stardate:          90986.28   

  

Sol III Date:     19/05/2013

OK. It's Sunday, which makes yesterday Saturday.

What happened to Thursday and Friday?

 Stardate:         90973.03

Sol III Date:     14/05/2013/23:04

Say do you know how to make (insert name of Deity of choice) Laugh? Tell Him (Her, It) your plans for the future.

  

When fate hands you lemons, make lemonade, sell it and buy an AK 47 and see if Fate ever hands you lemons again.     Tao of James

 Stardate:        909 59.29

Sol III Date:    09/05/2013/22:30

Price for a barrel of Oil is remains under $100, so the price of gasoline in Abbotsford remains..........

What???......The cost of gas in Abbotford has jumped to $139.9???

Talk about robberies at gas stations.